05 November 2007

and she's down



sometime halloween night, I got sick. and I mean sick. the kind that requires huddling underneath several layers of blankets and sheets, the kind that causes you to cry out nightly for mommy, the kind that comes from behind and knocks you squarely off your feet.

I felt the strangest sense of relief the second I fell back onto the big green couch that night. I let it swallow me whole and could barely keep my eyes open as the kids enthusiastically dumped large plastic pumpkins full of candy onto the floor. it felt so good to let things go and let someone else take over. I can't remember the last time I was this sick. so not fun. not like I ever thought it was, but you always remember the laying around and the sipping of ginger ale and tea with lemon and honey and all the tv-watching and magazine-reading. that part of it always seems so appealing to me. and I did do plenty of that (as well as put a sizable dent in the book I'm currently reading), but wow. it has been a most unpleasant four days. nothing but aches and pains and chills that felt biblical in proportion and fevers that gave way to strange, sweaty blocks of sleep.

but the mister, he took good care of me. and there was really only one morning where I had to set the sickness aside and uphold my motherly duties. that's the toughest thing, when you're sick as a dog and all you want to do is crawl to the nearest bed and pass out but you can't because you're a mother and those children, they need to be taken care of. it's the worst thing because how do you take good care without getting them sick? how do you make them snacks? lunch? my poor salad tongs never worked so hard. in my seven years of mothering, all I can say is that you do what you have to do to make it through. and little ezra, all he wanted was to be close to me. which meant that he sat on the couch right near my head, all the time asking, 'mommy, you sick? you sick, mommy? you better? you wanna lick one a dese suckers?' he was holding two grape suckers, one in each hand. he'd found his halloween candy stash and I was too weak to do anything about it, too sick to care. like I said, you do what you have to do to make it through and anyway, I appreciate the gesture, kid. I'm willing to overlook the fact that you offered me those licks sometime before breakfast. which means you got to your candy before breakfast. I'm not even going to think about that.

but today, I'm up. I'm showered and ready to go. I haven't been outside the house in four days (and haven't even cared to venture out until now) but the world, it looks a little better today. because my head has stopped pounding and I can swallow without crying and well, that's something.

12 comments:

  1. oh andrea- so sorry you are sick. it sucks. wanna know why i know? because i could've written this post! right now, my girl has pink eye (aka stink eye) in both eyes, and me, my girl and my little guy all have the flu. strangely enough i seem to have it the worst, which makes me want to cry. like reaaaly cry. and i'm not a crier. but the pounding! when you wrote about your head pounding i'm all "yes! yes!" and the amount of blankets i have on my bed is absolutely ridiculous. my husband keeps questioning the quantity of blankets, but i keep saying "but i'm just so COLD", and then he proceeds to tell me that actually i'm on fire.

    thank you for writing about this, because i just couldn't put it out there in the blogiverse.

    sending pink-eye-less hugs,

    nina beana

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  2. glad you are feeling better andrea. sending you a hug. xo

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  3. somehow, andrea, even your sick days are beautiful!

    hope you're feeling well after facing the world today. and that you'll feel even better tomorrow. good enough for grape lollipops of your own!

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  4. awww, man that stinks. glad you are feeling better.

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  5. Oooh, I definitely know how that feels. I was knocked down for a week last September and didn't even venture downstairs (let alone outside the building) to check the mail for 5 days. But I'm glad to hear you're feeling better, and I wish you a speedy recovery!

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  6. Good to know you're past the worst...get better soon!

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  7. i think noggin was on for 6 hours straight last week when david & i were sick. i mean really. glad you are feeling better lady. care for a hug?

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  8. might be interesting for you:
    http://torevealartandconcealtheartist.blogspot.com/

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  9. oh i hate being that sick. glad you are on the mend....

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  10. Awwh lady! I am glad to hear you are feeling better. It all sounds so miserable...

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  11. feel beeter you sweet thing. this is synchronistic because i am reading this from home , i got up to get ready for work and realized, oh dear, i'm sick. and as soon as i relaxed into it and called in sick, i felt a certain comfort in jsut taking care of myself, drinking lemonade, wearing cozy slippers, cuddling into my bed, my dog, forgetting work. i think that the body gets sck when it needs a small eprsonal break. i am goign to honor it even thugh i can't swallow and feel cruddy. it is a perfect day for being sick, grey and dark and chilly novermebry. i hope you feel better and are out enjoying the world!

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