30 July 2012
well, twelve rolled around last week. twelve. and the day was met (head on, mind you) with donuts, balloons and downtown adventures. the maudlin me wants to get lost in talk about change. about long, spindly legs and bright eyes. about neon earrings and the sharing of shoes. about first dances, first loves, first everything. the maudlin me could go on for hours like this.
I so clearly remember twelve. plus thirteen, fourteen, fifteen and so on and so forth. but twelve. twelve is at the edge of so much. I know this now. I can see it and I can see her, perched right there at the edge. all I really can do is hold her hand (if she'll let me, less and less she lets me) and see her through to the other side of things. which is where? college? adulthood? wherever it is, all I can do is see her through. and I will tell her this when I can and she will roll her eyes sometimes and I'll wince but I'll tell her anyway. because she'll need to hear it. just like I needed to hear it, just like every girl needs to hear it.