16 May 2006
self portrait #28
hello, I'm a mother.
if I met you on the street and you asked me what I did for a living, this is what I'd tell you. inside I'd be screaming AND SO MUCH MORE and I'd want to talk about the outreach program I've been teaching for/dancing with for the past fifteen years and the degree I have in dance education and how I love to write and make art. on most occasions, I would feel as if you had already mentally filed me away in the universal category of stay-at-home moms (yawn) because culturally, that's what we do-- we find great comfort in putting people, places and things in neat little boxes with broad labels attached. I speak with authority here because I am guilty of this. so yes, I'm a mother and you can find me at any given moment nursing a child, pushing a stroller, shopping for groceries with a toddler on my hip, sounding out words with a little girl who is just learning to read and answering the endless string of 'why' questions that get fired off in my direction (and the list goes on and on). everyday I struggle for balance, to put my children first but keep that part of me alive that is my own. so that they'll know-- ava and ezra, they'll know.
after taking a closer look at this week's self portrait, nothing holds more truth than this thing that I am, this everyday/every night/for the rest of my life state of motherhood. do you see ava in the background? at the end of the day, this is the biggest part of who I am.
(more introductory self portraits here)