05 August 2007

photobooth friday

posted way late because we are all still looking for the butter. I'm telling you, we've looked everywhere-- under beds, couches, chairs, in toy bins, sock drawers and trash cans. ezra's story changes on an hourly basis. yesterday morning, we decided to call off the search, get out of the house and explore the city. which meant a trip to the farmers market, a ride on the streetcar and a stop at little finnegan's (where we bought hello kitty erasers, tiny wind-up robots and put ezra into the photobooth with a viking hat on his head). later that afternoon, the subject of the missing butter resurfaced. again, cryptic answers from a giggly, TOTALLY GUILTY ezra.

I know it's time to let it go. I know the butter (well, earth balance) will eventually turn up. hopefully when I'm in a good mood. hopefully on a day when I need a good laugh. and hopefully soon. but I'm having great difficulty letting it go because how does an entire tub of butter go missing like that? where could it be? it's making me loco.

which has me thinking of how crazy I get when I lose things. I lose things all the time-- mainly my car keys and cell phone but every once in a while, I lose something special, something irreplaceable. once, I lost my brother's wedding ring. on his wedding day and just moments before the ceremony was to begin. total nightmare situation for anyone, but especially if it's your first stint as maid of honor and the groom is your brother and he is counting on you (of all people) to keep your head on straight during such an important sort of day.

well, that ring-- it just disappeared. at least, that's what it felt like. the second I realized it was gone, I was a mess. I remember wildly dumping the contents of my tiny purse over and over and over again, all the time whispering no no no nooooooooo. I remember getting on my hands and knees in my floor-length dress, frantically searching the dressing room, the bathroom and hallways of the church, beads of sweat forming along my upper lip as I scanned every possible surface. then it was time for the ceremony to begin, which also meant it was time to come clean and tell The Bride. omg, omg, omg what would kendra put on nate's finger when it came time to exchange rings? I wanted to cry, my eyes were watering and I felt sick to my stomach. where could that ring be? where where where? when I lose things, I tend to repeat words. as in: where where WHERE? why why WHY? and NO NO NO. just seconds before I was to walk down the aisle, we asked my cousin if we could borrow his wedding band-- just for the ceremony. then I sped down the aisle at a most ridiculous pace-- step together step together step together in double, triple, quadruple time. I remember feeling nervous and stupid. I remember trying not to cry. more than anything, I remember thinking WHERE COULD THAT RING BE?

beautiful ceremony, yada yada yada. slight look of befuddlement on nate's face as kendra slips a yellow gold band onto his finger instead of the white gold one they'd picked out together. and then they were pronounced husband and wife (at which point, the sounds of the jackson five's ABC filled the sanctuary, a pleasant surprise to us all). in this moment, I was happy. I'd forgotten about the lost ring, that I still had to face my brother (and everyone else) afterwards. I knew he'd understand, I knew he would not hold it against me. still, I hated that I was the one responsible for losing his wedding ring. I couldn't stand the idea that this would be one of the stories they'd tell about their big day and that I'd forever be the flaky, flighty sister who lost the ring and then lost her head over it.

immediately after the ceremony, the entire wedding party (turned search party) convened in the back dressing room. groomsmen dumped make-up bags and pawed through pots of lip gloss and tubes of mascara. bridesmaids crawled around on all fours and looked under tables and chairs. pairs of wadded-up pantyhose were carefully inspected. kleenex boxes were torn apart. and the bride and the groom were there too-- when they should have been basking in newlywedded bliss and posing for photographs, they were back in that hot little room with me and everyone else, tearing everything apart, desperately hoping to find that ring.

and then I felt it. something cold and small pressed against my chest. I closed my eyes and slowly reached inside the front of my dress. there, near the bottom of my bra, was The Ring. it had been there all the time, nestled comfortably in the dark hollow of cleavage that I'd been so careful to conceal that day (because who wants to showcase cleavage on your brother's wedding day? I mean, really). time stopped just then, as the rest of the room realized that the ring had been recovered, that it had been with me all long (and in my bra, of all places). ah, just the visual my brother wanted on his wedding day, I'm sure. well, at least I'd found it, okay. unfortunately, that didn't change how stupid I felt. I then remembered having a conversation with a few of the bridesmaids about the ring. I was worried that I would lose it and joked that maybe I should cram it inside my bra for safe-keeping. that way I would know exactly where it was, I said. ha. obviously, not one of my better plans. really, how could I have forgotten that? how did I get through the whole ceremony without feeling that thing rolling around in there? how how how?

what this has to do with a lost tub of butter is... not a lot. except that I think I will feel just as relieved when that tub of butter is recovered. the moment the great mystery of the missing butter is solved will be right up there with the moment I pulled nate's wedding ring from my cleavage (in terms of personal triumph, that is). ah, but only the little viking knows the answer, folks. only the viking.


the whole self
pinky doll
eat more weggies


  1. sister, you rule. and so does ezra the viking.

  2. and, then, when the viking is all grown up, you will all have THIS story to look back on...with relief...and laughter... :)

    p.s. check your bra drawer for the butter.

  3. just letting you know that i've added your blog to my links!

  4. you will find it, and i agree it will be such a great story to look back on. i can't imagine how frustrating it must be. he probably thinks it's a big huge game the whole family is in on and is loving it. :)

  5. where could that butter be? sneaky boy, that one.

    oh my, if that wedding ring could talk, the tales it would tell. :) great story--you had me on the edge of my seat!

    i always enjoy reading your stuff.

  6. Oh I know the feeling of odd disappearances. Thursday I've burnt 3 CDs of great music for my husband (he works far from home, so he needs a little musical boost in his car) and, darn, only two can be found! Still looking...

    And, I'm SURE I've put the 3 CDs in the car, but they're not there!!!

    When I was younger and objects mysteriously disappeared we used to accuse our neighbor, Monsieur Lebel. Of course, we didn't know him, we just fantasized about him coming at night and taking ransom objects. I'm sure he's the one with the 3rd CD, by the way. And I've seen him putting butter on his toasts this morning with a guilty attitude... :-)

  7. Great post.
    I have this habit of getting in the car to go somewhere, sitting in the passenger seat next to my husband and doing this little routine which involves removing my wedding ring and putting moisturizing lotion on my very dry hands. I usually look for a place to put my ring temporarily and most times it ends up tucked in my cleavage. While this is a regular routine, I still manage to get distracted at times, forgetting to put my ring back on and then freaking out thinking I lost it, only to find it in my bra, my pocket, the cup holder of the car... I totally understand where you are coming from. I usually mumble a fast 'oh no, oh no, oh no..." while searching. :)

  8. That story had me rolling in the aisles (bad joke, sorry). Seriously hilarious (and I'm so glad you found it!). I can imagine the giggles coming from Ezra, not fessing up where the butter was stashed. I hope you find it soon!

  9. I LOVED the ring story. Hilarious, and beautifully written.

  10. great story, but i think what is even better are those photos of you little viking... wonderful.

  11. Thanks for sharing your ring story. I lost my own ring for about two weeks during my second year of marriage. Not sure why I took it off but after searching my purse eighteen times, I found it nestled in the folds of satin at the bottom.

    So, I found your blog from your flickr site and I'm so glad I did. And, the part about Red Velvet Cake made me smile because my good friends and I have an art group called Red Velvet Art. Mostly because we love the cake, too.

  12. you are my favorite flighty friend:)

    your brain is full of much more important things then the whereabouts of things:)

    love you friend!

  13. i'm addicted. to your storytelling. i hope the butter resurfaces soon. before it melts.

  14. uh huh...
    have you checked your cleavage?

    Better yet, do you detect a sense of jealousy from someone who doesn't really *have* cleavage, to speak of? :)

    that was SO funny! Adored this post. AND that cherubic (I'm sorry, vikingish?) smirk on Ezra.

  15. Dear god, wedding rings in the bra and missing butter...I haven't stopped laughing! I really needed that.

    Thank you!

  16. thanks for the kind words, all! still no sign of the butter. *sigh*

    kristen, as always-- thank you. xo

    les, I would've cried if the butter had turned up in my bra drawer. ha.

    vesper, thanks! honored to be added to your list!

    meridith, yes! he definitely picked up on the whole game vibe and is TOTALLY fueled by it. hey, and by the way-- thanks for the tip on the wyler's italian ice pops! we do have the dollar tree out here and you better believe I'm going to hit up every single one until I find those bad boys. miss you, m! xo

    tami, thanks so much! much appreciated on my end, friend. and yes, if that wedding ring could talk... I'm sure that's what my brother was trying NOT to think of. haha.

    dominique, that's so funny! maybe ezra and monsier lebel are in cahoots.

    laundrygirl, that's really funny. and your story makes me feel a little bit better about myself. does that make any sense? :)

    claire, so glad it made you laugh. because all that craziness should be worth a laugh now.

    bohemienne, thank you so much for the kind words.

    stephanie s, thanks! yeah, I'm really loving him in the viking hat. it suits him, I think.

    rachelD, so glad to hear you found your ring (yay for happy endings) and super glad you found your way here. flickr is nice like that, yes? as for red velvet cake-- yes, I'm a bit nutty over it. always nice to find fellow red velvet cake lovers! and what a great name for a blog. looking forward to checking you out. :)

    joy, thanks for the love, friend. miss you!

    leslie, thank you! I'm sure the butter is all liquidy now. oh well. at least it's in a container. I HOPE it's still in a container.

    steph, I could do without this cleavage some days, my friend. wanna trade? ha.

    tiffany, so glad I could help... makes me happy. :)

    miss dot, I tried to publish your comment and for some reason, it didn't go through... sorry about that! thanks so much for your comment, though. :)

  17. At our house it's toothpaste. Three tubes vanished. I stumbled across one and then Canon led me on a wild goose chase to find the other two. I love a good mystery (ummm...unless it is holding up a wedding).

  18. please email me:
    1. Your name
    2. Your snail mail address
    3. Your blog/flickr site
    for the cd swapy

  19. I love Ezra the Viking! Great blog!

    I'll post a link on my blog, Casa Zoe.

    Thanks for the smile!

  20. this story is amazing, i'm so glad you found THE RING, and hopefully you are able to laugh about it. with that said, i hope you find the butter! ezra rules as a viking!

  21. I laughed out loud when I read the last post. And I'm totally intrigued...
    This post was a total delight - you have not only a terrific eye but also a way with words that I just love. Looking forward to the next butter installment.

  22. great stories. isn't chaos great to look back on?

  23. Ah, stories like that make life worth living. Seriously, seriously good.