perspective

when things get to be too much, I ride. I get on my bike and I ride and ride. when my head is a mess and the house is a mess and the kids are a mess and supper is not magically appearing as I was hoping maybe it would, I head for the garage. this is where my favorite bike waits patiently for me. if I can, I ride during the magic hour when the long legs of daylight stretch out before me and the tops of the houses glow. I pedal as fast as I can. I coast, pedal and repeat. my old bike rattles and creaks like an old carnival ride which makes me love her about a hundred times more than I already do.

I ride past manicured yards and not-so-manicured yards, past papery poppies and complicated irises, past my favorite aqua-colored house and the convenience store on the corner. I collect the scents of the neighborhood as I go. grilled beef from the vietnamese restaurant down the street, laundry drying in a basement, grass wet from sprinklers, hints of honeysuckle. trash day is coming and discarded items sit in jumbles at the end of each driveway. they know what's coming. a broken shovel, a tangle of white tubing, a seatless tricycle, a metal shoe rack that has obviously been replaced by a shinier, more promising shoe rack. they know they are headed for the dump but they are oddly hopeful. someone could still come in the night and take us home, they think. it could happen, they think. past trash and recycling bins I go, past a little league game and the school playground and onto familiar (and unfamiliar) streets. I am always changing my route. I never take the same way twice.

it's been exactly one year since I bought this bike. best eighty dollars ever spent. I can't really explain what happens when I ride except that things sort of shake loose. things that really need to shake loose. my shoulders relax, my chest opens up. and when I'm riding fast, the wind blows my hair back and away from my face. it feels a little like flying. I am a big fan this feeling. but the plain truth is that my bike keeps me sane. daily rides clear my head. things seem to fall away when I ride. I think maybe they call this perspective.

when I get home, dinner still has to be made, messes still have to be cleaned up, deadlines still wait. but I am a thousand pounds lighter and my mind is quiet. and that's definitely worth eighty dollars. definitely.


p.s. all this riding has me dreaming of bicycle accessories. checkit, it's my magic three.